I got up and looked in the mirror today,
eyes squinting in the sunlight piercing through the slits in the blinds,
the shape of a bird forms in the corner of my eye;
gold beak like the backs of your teeth,
and two blue crescent moons glimmering back at me,
its feathers preened and delicate,
I draw the string
flooding the room with the shower of morning
I pry each eye open,
press a contact lens onto each pupil,
…the bird has gone missing
the day passes after the other and another that you haven’t come back,
there’s more shade than sunlight now,
still, you don’t return
so it’s beginning to settle-in
that you’re no longer here,
I can’t pry my eyes open any wider,
but I can feel you nearby,
perhaps behind all the grime on this reflective surface,
or maybe it’ll help if I close my eyes,
here goes then,
teach me the silence,
I want to hear the birds tweeting
teach me how to tread,
as to avoid tripping over
teach me the veins of life through the leaves,
I want to trace the fighting genes of a seedling
there are flashes of gold in the glass before me,
is that you,
is that you?
teach me the routes of the trees and plants,
I want to carve my own path
teach me the origins of the soil, the sand and the dust,
I want to embellish this journey with the earth’s confetti
teach me the ocean,
I want to feel its salty breath on my flesh
teach me the ways of the wind,
I can’t keep thrashing against it
I want to get away
I want to get away
from myself
today
teach me the art of calm,
when the storm is billowing outside
teach me surrender
teach me patience
teach me softness
teach me how to breathe,
I’m choking
teach me
how to be
even when the sea churns
and we’re bobbing on the surface
unrested and uneasy
feathers are falling in the dust around me
is that you,
is that you?
our spines bend and creak
like a mast
teach me how to tac, as to avoid hurling overboard
teach me how to unravel sails
and tighten them fast
teach me the knots,
both the intricate and the quick ones
teach me an escape route
(my mind just won’t settle and)
you seem to be an expert (at escaping)