In the name of friendship

We sat in that cafe

And I poured my heart out

And told you my greatest fears

I told you about what my heart aches for

as I painted my perception of the world to you

And you told me yours,

And you cracked a modest smile

And told me that I was a warrior,

I smiled back

And took your advice

as I listened on as you shared your words,

We carried on sipping our hot drinks on that rainy winter day

as we shared our poetry and fragments of personal and made-up stories

As we do from time to time,

exchanging our thoughts and ideas

In this sacred space where everything goes and all is valid and worthy of critique

Where concepts flourish as they burn radical change through unturned pages

The uplifting and enlivening moments

Are the ones we must keep

And hold onto forever

To help us learn and grow

For the Wanderer in all of us

This whole business of being alive is a rollercoaster ride, a kaleidoscope of wonders, a prism of everchanging scenes.

You’ve got to be brave to weather the tides and you’ve got to be a fool to carry on by. Foolishly in love with the experience, the adventure, and exploration, and danger.

Why live small when you were born to be bold and speak your mind, to stand up for your cause, to have a good time. You know, you can be what ever you want to be.

To be… One of the most puzzling things of all. Shakespeare suggested it while Hamlet pondered it, Camus questioned it, Hemingway gave up on it, Heidegger studied it, Thoreau explored it… What are you going to do with it?

How about first simply just being. Being present in this moment, right now, on this tab in this browser. Not on your phone, not halfway through an email while a video of a laughing baby is on pause and you’re having a conversation with a friend next to you.

Zone in, take this breath in with me, breathe it all in…1, 2, 3… Now Release, haaa and let it all go, all the distractions, the fragments of pain, all indecision, all misfortunes we endure, our expectations and any overthinking. Let it be, let your breath lead. Just be.

This is not the final destination. This is the beginning of it all. It takes courage to strive. To be and only so is to have not lived, it is to have stayed inside. To embrace the fact that you are alive is to seek in the world that is already inside.

Have that drink, take that photo, crack that joke, strike up that conversation you’ve been dying to have, wear that flame-red dress, spin in the wind if you like, kiss the flowers and eat the berries. Do what feels right, let your heart be your guide, take your clothes off and swim in the churning deep blue.

Adventure awaits, it’s time to take the plunge. Come on, let’s go!

On the importance of self-compassion

I think it’s important to be open and honest with yourself and with others, to do what makes you happy and to ignore the naysayers.

This is your journey, allow yourself to enjoy the ride. It’s not your responsibility to change anyone else’s mind. If you focus on cultivating and enriching all aspects of your own life and work, you will inadvertently, positively influence others. I’m starting to realise the significance of the sentiment ‘If your compassion does not include yourself it is incomplete’.

If you respect yourself it will inevitably convert to you respecting and understanding others and thus you won’t have to worry about hurting or trespassing others as deep rooted care and respect will guide you wisely.

This may leave you open to being trespassed or hurt by others who do not value this sentiment, but it is so revitalising to know that although heartache and betrayal hurt, I’d rather feel everything than nothing at all. The beauty of life lies in one’s openness to change and uncertainty. To resilience and self-respect.

I’ve begun to realise how important it is to risk leaving your heart open. Even if you’ve already been broken no matter how badly, the deepest wounds heal with time and with personalised care. You are strong enough to pick up the pieces and try again.

After the worst is over and dealt with, you can run wild and free and stay true to what’s right for you. Knowing that trusting too much can be just as debilitating as hiding behind walls. You’ll have a greater sense of knowing when others aren’t as sincere or genuine as you’d like to believe. You’ll have a deeper understanding of yourself, of what you like and just as importantly what you do not want or need in your life.

Everyone’s journey is unique and special in their own way, it’s up to each of us to find the magic in our own story and find peace and harmony in the path we’re treading, or to find the inner strength to change direction if we find ourselves unhappy.

Start with yourself

Love is not selfish,

and has no conditions,

there is no rule book,

no rules or regulations,

Love should set you free,

not coil you into a cobra basket

of codes and currencies,

Love weathers distance and time

and forgives heedless mistakes

from decisions made on a whim.

Love trusts and understands that we’re all always learning.

Love is hopeful, and sees beauty beneath the dark shadows,

love is patient.

Love is to be shared,

True love has a way of being at peace.

Finding Home

“So much of our time is spent running from ourselves, or hiding from the world.
There is a feeling that you should go home,
and spend a lifetime finding out just where that is.”
– Pico Iyer

Thank you,
and goodbye.

I will now use this sadness as a lesson,

This curse as a blessing,

My trusting heart to be open,

and this solitude for compassion,

As I now hold all those golden memories as little treasures.

The beautiful souls live on within,

For if I never see their faces again

I can always return to my dreams,

to relive the moments where life stood still

And everything seemed at one.

Where I once felt that I’d found home.

To fall through the sky

you know, it scared me,

to see you so calm in front of those familiar faces,

to switch when the door clicked,

and those innocent eyes fell away,

and that warm smile dissipated from your face.

You scared me.

The way your eyes pierced me when I was cowering in the corner,

Just wishing for an escape shoot to separate beneath me and set me free,

but there was never an easy way to leave,

And you thrived on knowing that you could always block the only exit,

that you were bigger and louder than me,

that I’d stay and you’d shout,

and I’d feel more and more lost,

And you’d tell me that my fear and sadness was the cause of all the stress.

You devoured every passionate kiss like it was the first you’d ever tasted,

and you sunk your teeth into my flesh to suck out the light that was left.

Now sometimes I start to wonder if you ever cared at all,

or if I was just another of your possessions that you could never force and fit on your shelf.

A prize that you tried to bury for no one’s eyes but your own,

so as you saw me slipping away,

your grip grew tighter and your eyes grew wider,

and it only fell apart faster as the light began to breathe through the cracks.

To shine once more, this time through your stronghold,

as I slipped through the opening crevices,

and out of your grasp.

Path of destruction

“Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth.” – Buddha

My heart is breaking with each lie you place on the stake

to burn and burn until the ashes are indistinguishable

I guess your mask is stronger than your steel-caged heart,

But someday it’ll all catch up to you,

You’re trying to make me out to be a monster just because you can’t contain the monster inside yourself

‘Cause really, you don’t even know what you’re talking about,

you’re simply misconstruing facts just to save your name,

so you took a liar’s words and used them as your own,

just because he’s your own, and you couldn’t bear the truth

And you left me stranded, you put me out in the cold,

you’d rather rub good names in the dirt than lift your mask off and help

you broke my heart then snatched up the pieces and just threw them out to sea,

but there’s no salvation or peace in the games you like to play,

just because you’re older doesn’t make you wiser than I,

The truth hurts, but it also has the power to heal the wounds of the harshest storms…

Rest Your Head Here For the Night

Let me melt away all your worry,

when nothing else can,

as we fall into the depths of these sheets and pillows,

here, our restless minds lay,

as we bury our tired heads within wistful dreams.

Still feels like we’re on overdrive,

but each second tears away at the pace.

Floating on a cumulus cloud,

as we watch the birds flock by us,

their feathers fanning our faces,

our eyes already closed, our lips tender,

the leaves rustle in the tall trees,

as we gaze at them from afar,

the pine needles trill in the breeze,

and the rusted, prickly grass nestles under the beaming spring sun.

A sign of change,

of things to come,

A glimpse of enchantment.

At once, we forget about our pasts,

and our unanswered futures, our fears of the unknown.

Blooming buds,

of purple petals and furry leaves,

thorn-lined stems and smooth cheeks,

A smile, a warm sigh, as the lake breathes heavy,

draws us in,

encapsulates our bodies as we float on in,

driving us forward into this wild adventure.

We drift far, far away,

awaiting the day that follows.

Souls Submerged in the Soil

Let’s go exploring and see what we can forge,

Together we can find something bigger than ourselves,

maybe, together honey,

We’ll discover where we are, who we are, what we’re here for

The questions start flowing

as we start running,

Pouring through the empty towns,

and hollowed out streets,

over cobblestone paths and unfilled pot holes,

Trudging through the muddy grass,

Stepping across vast flourishing fields

the possibilities seem endless.

The sun beams onto our sweating faces,

the rain showers upon our skin, dampening our clothes, washing away the day’s whims

The stars glimmer, the moonlight floods the trees,

with their intricate branches,

wrinkled bark and crumpled leaves,

persistent weeds grab and cradle the roots of the structure as it persists.

We nest in the depths of the darkness,

the mysteries remain,

the curiosity still lingers,

awaiting another day of exploration,

we’ll just stay here for the night,

burrowing in each others’ arms,

entangled in our insatiable desires and inquisitive minds

to experience it all.